17 Signs You’re (GASP!) an Adult, from All Groan Up

One of my high school friends got me into the website All Groan Up, which is a wonderful place for 20-somethings to come together about what’s going on in our lives.  And, if you’ve noticed (I’m sure you have), my URL is browneyedtwentysomething.wordpress.com, so I feel like I fit the category.  I’ve been hanging onto some of my favorite lists of emails from that site, and I decided to incorporate them into the Topical Friday posts throughout the year.  And this is the first one![i]

I’m going to treat this like I treated Lauren Conrad’s New Year’s Resolutions and explain each one after I list it.  Thanks, All Groan Up, for knowing how I feel!

17 Signs You’re Emerging into Adulthood

  1. Ikea has become your Disneyland.  I love Disneyland, but Ikea… it’s this beautiful maze of cheap Swedish furniture that I want to pick up and drop into the house I do not have.  Ha.  I’ve actually gotten to the point where I think I will start buying higher quality furniture than is found at Ikea, but most of my living room and bedroom, and part of the kitchen originated in that store.
  2. Sleep goes from being your nemesis who you avoid, to your best friend whom you wish would come over more often.  Oh gosh.  Remember staying up until all hours of the morning in college, watching marathons of TV shows and eating junk food?  Or, if you were a more serious student, studying until you’re kicked out of the library at closing time?  Seriously, who needed sleep?  Well, I have come to realize that I do.  I can’t function anymore on the solid four hours that used to get me through a full day of classes.  Now, if I don’t get six or seven, I’m dragging, I’m grumpy, I’m dozing off at work.  It’s bad.  Sleep is my best friend these days, and anything that starts after 8 pm is waaaaaaaaay too late.
  3. Finishing an entire season of your favorite show in a day doesn’t quite feel like the accomplishment it used to.  Nope.  That used to be the dream, you know?  But now I feel like I’ve wasted precious hours of my life, hours I could have spent doing laundry, or washing dishes, or cooking or baking.  It’s sad, really.  But you just can’t get away with it anymore.
  4. If all the work emails you’ve read and written were placed side by side, they would cross the Atlantic Ocean.  There and back.  If I didn’t delete a copious amount of emails every day from my work account, this would definitely be true.
  5. Your body begins to ache from your vigorous lack of movement.  My shoulders are in a constant state of tense and achy, probably in large part because of the amount of typing I do for this blog, along with the fiction I’ve been working on and the homework assignments I have to type up.  Basically, I spend a large part of my life in front of a computer.  And it’s making my shoulders upset.
  6. Debt goes from being this fairy tale to be repaid in a land far, far, away to your daily reality show.  I got lucky.  I don’t have any student loans.  But I still get this, because credit card bills, rent, insurance payments, and utilities do not go away.  They are due, now!  Where is the money going to come from?  They don’t care!  Pay now!  Sigh.
  7. Memories of how you’re going to feel Sunday morning actually begin to factor into your decisions on Saturday night.  Oh, you want to get some housework done on Sunday?  You want to take the dog for a run?  You want to go grocery shopping?  Better stop now.  In fact, it’s 9 pm.  Better go to bed.
  8. A Christmas sweater with a reindeer on it feels like a good idea.  And you’re not being ironic.  I haven’t hit this point yet.  I haven’t.  I swear.
  9. You’ve mastered the interview “this is my dream job nod-and-smile” for a job you don’t want and can’t believe you’re applying for.  This one made me laugh, because here I am, working in a chemistry stockroom for forty hours a week.  Not exactly living the dream, but it pays the bills, so I am trying to suck it up and stop complaining so much.  But I know exactly what this is talking about.
  10. Facebook goes from being a hobby, to an obsession, to a chore you dread.  You know, this past Tuesday (February 4th) was the 10th anniversary of Facebook’s launch.  And I’ve had an account for 7 of those years.  Yikes.  So I totally get this.  I’m in some cool groups now, and I maintain some pages, so that helps.  But in general, I kind of dread seeing what everyone else is doing, who they are marrying, and how many babies they are having.  Ugh.
  11. 93% of the photos on your phone are of your pet or your baby.  The remaining pictures are things you’re trying to sell on Craigslist to make room for your pet or baby.  Cracking.  Up.  I have so many pictures of Ole on my phone that it’s getting ridiculous.  But I haven’t started auctioning things off on Craigslist yet.  Yet, I think, is the key word in that sentence.
  12. The thought of buying a new sofa or kitchen appliance makes you as giddy as a 12-year-old at a Justin Bieber concert.  This is so true.  Sadly, I do get that excited about things.  Oh!  A crock pot!  All the things I can make in there!  Goody!  Yeah, it’s sad, but it’s adult life.  Ha.
  13. You start cushioning all vacations with an extra day off for “recovery time.”  Do you know how exhausting traveling is?  It’s great fun, but I totally need a day to recuperate.  We planned our Texas trip this way – we have a day to do some laundry, relax, and retrieve the puppy from my parents’ house.
  14. You don’t spend the week organizing your plans for Saturday night.  No, organizing is your plans for Saturday night.  This should be part of my Saturday night plans more often.  That’s all I’m going to say on that.
  15. You haven’t sprinted in two years.  Something you realize too late as you try to dash across the street to avoid oncoming traffic, only to pull muscles you forgot you had.  Okay, so I can’t agree with this one.  I love to run, and usually try to sprint at the ends of races if I can.
  16. Classical music becomes this weird, welcome breather.  Doing the dishes becomes your relaxing getaway.  You’d pay $50 for an hour of silence.  Aside from the dishes, I agree with this.  The silence thing, especially.  Some days, I just want to lie on the couch in silence for twenty minutes.  Ole usually quickly points out how silly that sounds.
  17. You now understand what your parents meant when they said, “You’ll understand when you’re older.”  Sadly, yes.  Yes, I do.

Do you have any other indicators that you’ve become an adult?  Is there anything you think is incorrect?  Are you an adult yet?

Sadly, I am.

-A.


[i] And one of my favorites, because who hasn’t felt this way?

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2 thoughts on “17 Signs You’re (GASP!) an Adult, from All Groan Up

  1. Ha, I felt old a couple years ago when a buddy was MCing a battle of the bands at a bar in Austin. He put me on the list to get in. I did, but left after about 5 minutes because it was “too loud”. Plus it was getting late. Hahaha!

    1. Oh, gosh, I know the feeling. Ha. It hit midnight at a bar this past Saturday night, and my friends and I were all completely ready for bed. That was WAY too late. Haha.

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