“Sweeter than Fiction” by Taylor Swift

You can listen to the song here.

I need a swishy skirt like that.
I need a swishy skirt like that.

I need you all to know my intense love for Taylor Swift.[i]  She is the same age as me, so I often feel like I can relate to each new album of hers more than the last, because she’s such a talented lyricist.  I haven’t written about her yet because her album is over a year old now, so it’s old news to me (although, don’t get me wrong, I still love it).  But when her next album drops in the fall, look out!  Taylor Swift all day, every day![ii]  In my opinion, she really knocked it out of the park with this song, though.  It’s from the original soundtrack for the movie One Chance, which I haven’t seen, but the song can stand alone as well.  I maybe should have called this post “H – part 2.”  There’s your warning of the possible sap that may follow.

Here is the first verse, and an excellent introduction:

Hit the ground, hit the ground, hit the ground, oh, oh

Only sound, only sound that you hear is “no”

You never saw it coming

Slipped when you started running

And now you’ve come undone and, I, I, I, I’ve

Seen you fall, seen you crawl on your knees, hey, hey

Seen you lost in a crowd, seen your colors fade

Wish I could make it better

Someday you won’t remember

This pain you thought would last forever and ever

This was me about a year ago.  I didn’t know what I wanted to do with my life.  I didn’t know how I was going to continue to pay my bills.  I had just been rejected for the university that employs me.  I hated everything that was going on in my life, and I wanted a complete change.  I thought about leaving.  I thought about just quitting everything and taking off.  I’d done it before.  I wanted something entirely different.

But then, there was H.  Our relationship was still new, but he kept telling me “I wouldn’t be dating you if you weren’t smart.”  He was becoming my anchor.  So while that verse may be about me a year ago, the words could be his.

Just a shot, just a shot in the dark, oh, oh

All you’ve got, all you’ve got are your shattered hopes

They never saw it coming

You hit the ground running

And now you’re onto something, I, I, I say

What a sight, what a sight when the light came on

Proved me right, proved me right when you proved them wrong

And in this perfect weather

It’s like we don’t remember

The rain you thought would last forever and ever

It took a while after that rejection to get back on my feet.  I started running, which really helped with the feeling of helplessness that comes with not knowing what you want out of life, and where you fit into it all.  And then, out of nowhere, I discovered the field of technical writing.  And then, I found a graduate program that would help me learn how to use the programs, and gain the skills I would need to succeed in a new field.  Everything was online, so I could keep my current job.  I was accepted immediately, because, despite what I was being led to believe by agents, I am a good writer.[iii]  It was during my first semester that the idea for this blog took form.  And now I can say that I’m truly reading and writing every day, that I’m honing my craft and gaining a bit of a platform.  I’d like to be an editor.  For the first time in a very long time (if ever), I have an end goal.

And again, here’s H, smiling at me and saying “I told you so.”  Because he did.  I just hadn’t figured it out for myself yet.  I know I still have a ways to go, but at least I’m on the path to get there, now.

I’m hoping that, one day, I actually will make him proud.

-A.


[i] It’s not as strong as my love for Jennifer Lawrence, but it’s a lot of love.

[ii] Obviously, not really.  Just Mondays.

[iii] I haven’t been submitting to agents as frequently as is necessary to actually have success.  I’m hoping there will be some time for that between when my classes end this semester and when the summer session begins.  Because I’d really, really like to get published.

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