“If You Say So” by Lea Michele

Listen here.  But beware, your heart will break.

Maybe check this out, too, because Lea Michele has been just so poised and amazing after losing the love of her life.  I can’t even imagine.  And, of course, it’s on Ellen, because Ellen is the best.

Oh, gosh.  I’m trying hard not to cry just writing this.

Glee meant a lot to me.  I discovered the show during a transitional period in my life, and the first couple seasons definitely stick with me.  And the music helped me get through some tough times.  And Finn Hudson was my favorite character – I have a soft spot for dumb jocks, unfortunately, and he was so loveable.  He had such a heart of gold.

I was heartbroken when Cory Monteith died in July.  If you interested in my thoughts, you can read this post from my old blog, which I wrote a couple days after he died.

And when I heard that Lea Michele wrote and recorded a song about losing Cory, I expected to feel sad listening to it.  But I didn’t expect it to rip my heart out and stomp on it.

Look how happy they were.
Look how happy they were.

It’s been seven whole days

Seven whole days since you paralyzed me

Seven whole days

Seven whole days since you lost your fight

And I can’t get the last words that you said

Can’t get those words out of my head

Seven whole days

Seven whole days, and four words

And I can’t get away from the burning pain

I lie awake

And that fallen hero haunts my thoughts

How could you leave me this way?

It’s been seven whole days

Without your embrace

I want to see your face

I’ve got some things to say

Was just a week ago

You said, “I love you, girl.”

I said, “I love you more.”

Then a breath, a pause, you said,

“If you say so.”

I have no idea how she was feeling when she wrote this song, and imagining it brings tears to my eyes.  I am petrified of being left alone.  I feel like I finally found what I have been looking for this whole time, my other half, the love of my life, all of those clichés that are, unfortunately, true.  It feels like things aren’t actually happening to me until I get to share them with H.  So what would happen to me if he left me?

I can tell you one thing – I wouldn’t be as put together as Lea Michele has been.  I’d be a wreck.  A puddle on the floor.

Listening to this song is sad enough without needing to experience it myself.

The rest of this album (called Louder) is very good, by the way.  Her voice is amazing.  She has so much talent.lea-michele-louder-artwork



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