So! Here I am, finally on a computer again! I’ve been posting from the WordPress app on my phone for the last couple of days, so sorry for the short posts. But! Here I am, finally back at home. And I say finally only because I’m exhausted and not particularly pleased that I have to go to work in the morning. But what can you do?
Here’s the quick run-down of the wedding – there were some hitches, but none of it mattered in the end. #kplusc (the hashtag that I made up for them) was a wonderful event, and I’m so happy that I was a part of it. H’s sister is so happy now, and from the very first time I met her, that’s all I wanted for her. They are leaving for their honeymoon tomorrow and are actually staying here with H and I tonight. I’ll be taking them to the airport in the morning.
I’ll let you in on a little secret (it’s a secret I haven’t even told #kplusc, actually). I don’t process emotion well sometimes, and that has been the case surrounding their wedding. You see, they’re also moving away in a couple of weeks, and getting married was the beginning of having to say goodbye to them. Sort of. They’re moving to the South, so it’s not the end of the world. But I’ve been deeply, terribly sad. It feels like there’s this giant bubble in my chest that just keeps growing and growing, and eventually, it’s going to pop and I’m going to lose it. I’m not good with goodbyes. I’ve never been good with goodbyes.
But there are bigger and better things waiting for them in their future, and when I force myself to think about it that way, then I stop being so selfish and think about what this new job, what this new adventure, means for them, I’m happy again. Mostly happy. I’m trying to be happy.
But it’s hard, because I feel like I’ve gained a sister and a brother, and then right after I got them and got comfortable, they’re leaving. It’s silly. But I can’t help it.
I’m always okay when I’m the one leaving. But when people leave me, I can’t always handle it. Well. I can always handle it, but I can’t always handle it in a good and healthy way. So I’m working on that.
In any case, this is about their wedding. And it was beautiful. There were some things that they did that I hadn’t thought of before, but loved (like the anniversary dance!), and there were others that I wouldn’t choose for us (like the dollar dances). I was taking notes! But it’s the love that truly matters, and it completely filled the room.
It makes me more excited than ever to marry H in eight months.
Okay, I have to go to sleep now. Only seven hours until they’re headed to the airport!