I’m back in the Midwest again, just hanging out after a very busy morning and early afternoon. It’s been weird to be me for the last couple of weeks. I’ve been running around, flying around, jet-setting all over the place. I don’t hate it. I kind of love it, actually. It’s exhausting, but it’s the good kind of exhausting. The kind where you’re experiencing a million new things, and it’s exciting and scary and crazy, but you don’t want it to end. I’ve felt it before – when I studied abroad, when I interned in the nation’s capital, when I was interviewing for grad schools. I never wanted it to end.
And now I’m home again, expected to fall back into my old routine like it’s nothing. Like it’s just another day in the life. With this job, that might just be the case, actually. I already have more traveling on my calendar. There are always more things to see.
Between work and school and the wedding, I feel like I haven’t gotten the chance to just sit and take a breath in a while. I can do that right now, but it feels like I’m missing something. Like I should be doing something else that I forgot about. That might be true. I have a busy week ahead of me. But tonight, I want to slide back into my real life, not my jet-setting life. I’m going to hang out with Ole and H for a while, then meet some friends for dinner. I’m going to be who I always am, even if I feel different.
Because I’m not different. I’ve just been to a new place that maybe changed me a little bit. I fell back into how I felt when I was abroad – like I was a tiny person in a big world. Alone but united with everyone, all at once.
“Walking through the crowd, the village is aglow.
Kaleidoscope of loud heartbeats under coats.
Everybody here wanted something more.
Searching for a sound we hadn’t heard before.
And it said, ‘Welcome to New York. It’s been waiting for you.'”
Taylor always knows exactly how I feel.