Bachelorette Season 11, Episode 1: “You know this sets women back, like, thirty years.”

You can probably already tell how I feel about this season from the title.  Like, ugh.  Who does this to a person?

All right, I’ll back up a bit.

I don’t think I watched After the Final Rose at the end of Chris’s season in March.  I may have intentionally done that, based on what I was hearing might happen.  I couldn’t believe my ears and eyes, once I heard the news for sure.

Two Bachelorettes.

My first thought.  No.  Effing.  Way.

How DARE they??

For those of you reading this, you probably think I’m being ridiculous.  It’s just a stupid reality show, and they’re just trying to get ratings, A.  Calm down.  But no, that’s not it.  It’s so much more than that.  Let me take you on a side journey before I get into the recap.

Seester and I went to see Pitch Perfect 2 this weekend.  I love the first movie, and I LOVE Anna Kendrick (along with Brittany Snow, Rebel Wilson, and Skylar Astin).  But there was one scene that stuck out to me.  Beca (Anna Kendrick) is getting home from her secret internship (more on this in a separate post, perhaps?), and she sees the Bellas having a pillow fight through the window.  She walks in and says this very poignant line.  “You know this sets women back, like, thirty years.”

beca mitchell

That is how I feel about this season of the Bachelorette.

When the Bachelor first started, I hated it then, too.  Each year, one man gets to choose a woman from a crop of them who are all flocking and falling down for his attention.  Talk about the anti-feminist show, amirite?  But then the Bachelorette started, and I was like, ahhh.  An even playing field.  But then this season pushed back through all of the progress that was made, back to the beginning, when I, as a high schooler, even knew better.

“You know this sets women back, like, thirty years.”

So first, the men get to choose between two women, making this a popular vote?  Right.  Sure.  That’s awesome.  Completely fair.

“You know this sets women back, like, thirty years.”

Indeed.

All right, fine.  I’ve got it all out there now.  That’s how I feel about this stupid season.  I’ll recap now.

So, it was a typical night one.  We get introduced to some of the more interesting men, and then they all pile out of limos to meet the Bachelorette(s).  Many of them had weird gimmicks and jokes and gifts as ways to be remembered.  One guy rode up in a hot tub car, and another in a cupcake.  There were some balloons.  There was a lot of drinking.  And it was strange to watch the men gravitate toward one woman over the other.  And I kept sitting there like, ugh, you idiots that like Britt the best should just go home.

And then this one guy got so drunk that he grabbed Kaitlyn’s ass, and he did go home.  In a van.  Courtesy of Chris Harrison.  Which made the voting even—24 men who were chosen to be a fairly even split between the two women.  So.  Ugh.

All in all, it was a relatively boring episode with no conclusion.  We were left with Charrison walking toward the women to deliver the results of the votes, and then we cut to black and a TO BE CONTINUED flashed on the screen.

UGH.

I came to find out who the Bachelorette is!  Because I’ve vowed not to watch if it’s Britt.  I can’t handle another season of her strange dirty-hippy crying.  I can just focus on wedding planning and not watch for a season.  Easy peasy.

But I secretly really hope it’s Kaitlyn, because I want to watch.

The “conclusion” to the premiere (like, what?) is tonight, so we’ll see…

-A.

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